Making personal decisions about divorce: Patience is the name of the game

The decision to divorce is a very personal decision, and one that often takes months or years to arrive at. If the decision is a unilateral one, it will also take some time for the spouse receiving the news to absorb and adjust to the decision.   Grief, denial and anger are natural responses for the spouse receiving the news, especially if the end of your relationship was unexpected. Coming to terms with a spouse’s decision to divorce is unlikely to be instantaneous. Patience will be required by the spouse announcing the decision, and oftentimes patience is, by this time, in short supply.

In this common situation, the spouse making the decision has undoubtedly already gone through his or her own emotions of grief, denial and/or anger by the time the decision is made and then announced.   He or she has already had the opportunity to move through these emotions at his or her own pace, without being “rushed”, much less thrust into the reality of pending legal action. While it is difficult to be the deciding spouse, it is also difficult—sometimes even more so– to be the spouse on the receiving end of such news.

It would be helpful for the deciding spouse to remember how long it took to arrive at the decision to divorce, and all the emotions that likely led up to that decision. It is inevitable that the spouse on the receiving end of this news will need some time and space to adjust and regroup and go through his or her own emotional roller coaster as well.

Patience is the name of the game.  If you are considering divorce, it can help to talk with an attorney about your options and what the process might look like. Even if you’re not 100% sure, don’t hesitate to seek professional advice. We are here to help, no matter the outcome. Contact us here for a consultation.

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